


#wannabe heroes r us

by reversedhymnal (Hymn)



Series: <3 [4]
Category: Kingdom Hearts (Video Games)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Chatting & Messaging, Feelings Realization, Gummiphones (Kingdom Hearts), KHIII spoilers, M/M, Olympus Coliseum (Kingdom Hearts), Pre-Relationship, in-game fic, nine months later......, yah this is still dumb and wildly indulgent guys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:14:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26373277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hymn/pseuds/reversedhymnal
Summary: Riku wasn’t proud of it, but the first thing he did upon waking was grope blearily for his gummiphone. There were no windows in the storage room Phil had begrudgingly prepared for him the night before, so it took Riku a fair amount of scrabbling in the dark to find it, and, once he did, he immediately dropped it on his face as he tried to turn it on.“Ow,” he complained.Somewhere worlds away, Riku was absolutely certain that Sora and Kairi were laughing at him, even if they didn’t understand why.
Relationships: Kairi & Riku & Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Kairi & Riku (Kingdom Hearts), Mickey Mouse & Riku (Kingdom Hearts), Riku & Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Riku/Sora (Kingdom Hearts)
Series: <3 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1576135
Comments: 18
Kudos: 78





	#wannabe heroes r us

**Author's Note:**

> i cant believe how long its taken me to finish this fic :| 
> 
> fair warning, there's a lot of riku&kairi in this and i have ZERO REGRETS they're the best! but also keep in mind that the road to feelings realization ne'er did run smooth lol

Riku wasn’t proud of it, but the first thing he did upon waking was grope blearily for his gummiphone. There were no windows in the storage room Phil had begrudgingly prepared for him the night before, so it took Riku a fair amount of scrabbling in the dark to find it, and, once he did, he immediately dropped it on his face as he tried to turn it on. 

“Ow,” he complained.

Somewhere worlds away, Riku was absolutely certain that Sora and Kairi were laughing at him, even if they didn’t understand why.

It was far from Riku’s usual routine: wake up, do some quick stretches, and see about food and getting on the road. He had never been one for idling, not even back before all of this started, when he and Kairi and Sora were just kids on Destiny Islands. Sora was the lazy bum, as Kairi had liked to call him. Riku was far more prone to getting antsy and snappish if he lingered too long in bed with nothing but his own restless thoughts for company.

But that was before the gummiphone existed.

**LEA** :

_A selfie of Axel and Kairi, both sweaty and dirty and with their hair pinned on top of their heads._

BUN BUN  
#training ‘dos #bun bros #its so freaking hot today #kairi

Riku smiled at the ridiculous faces the two were making. Time within the worlds often ran differently, with the Dark World and Secret Forest being the most out of sorts, or so it seemed. But Riku had the sneaking suspicion that the Olympus Coliseum might be another of those places where reality ran slightly adrift, considering there were zero posts from any of the inhabitants of Radiant Garden or Twilight Town, or even from Sora, Donald, and Goofy. 

There were, however, two posts a little further down from Kairi, and it was the first time Riku’s feed hadn’t had difficulty shuffling them into order amongst the rest of the feed.

Weird.

Weirder still was the sinking sensation in Riku’s chest, the disappointment far stronger than it should have been. He’d spoken to Sora just _yesterday_ , after all. How spoiled had Riku become, that the prospect of a single day without hearing from Sora or seeing some goofy post of his could make him so glum? It was embarrassing. Annoying. Riku shouldn’t even be here in bed, lounging about on the gummiphone. Instead, he should be puzzling out an answer to his problem with Braveheart; figuring out who he’d become, that his heart was so changed.

Huffing, Riku pulled up his DMs.

_YOU MESSAGED KAIRI DIRECTLY:_  
 **RIKU** :   
So, how do you deal with having to wait days on end for updates about us?  
Looks like the Coliseum is a bit weird.

**KAIRI** :   
IT SUCKS  
RIKU IT SUCKS SO MUCH  
DID YOU KNOW I SPENT A WEEK ONCE THINKING YOU’D DIED IN THE DARK REALM?  
AND ALSO THAT SORA HAD CHOKED ON A PIE

Riku, of course, remembered that incident: one of Goofy’s videos in which Donald and Sora had egged each other on in an eating contest, to see who could finish off an entire tarte aux fruit quicker than the other. The video itself had ended in Goofy’s startled yelp as Sora choked on a slice of blood orange. 

**RIKU** :   
But...Goofy never would have posted it if he’d died?

**KAIRI** :   
How would I know?! Maybe it was tribute to him after his ignoble death!?!?!

**RIKU** :   
But……..  
Sora commented………..  
Almost immediately after it was posted………..

**KAIRI** :   
IT TOOK TWO DAYS HERE FOR THOSE COMMENTS TO SHOW UP

There was a dizzying swoop of terror in Riku’s gut. 

He’d _known_ time was different for Kairi, but he hadn’t thought about what all that might mean. Not to this extent, at least. Two days waiting, with no way of speeding the agony along. Riku tried not to let that terror solidify, but his heart was immediately shrieking panic at the thought of having to go so long without hearing from Sora, or seeing him, or knowing that he was okay--

Riku took in a deep, calming breath. 

All of them had been through worse. He’d once spent an entire _year_ with Sora asleep, lost to him. Two days was nothing.

Except...

**RIKU** :   
I don’t know why this is so different.   
I’ve almost always gone off on my own missions while Sora’s adventuring, and I...I never worried about him. I could always trust he’d be okay.   
So why is this freaking me out so much?

**KAIRI** :   
You liar  
Did you or did you not get Mickey to follow Sora around as much as possible?  
Did you or did you not pop in to save the day every time he was in trouble??  
Did you or did you not instinctively dive into Sora’s dreams and become a DREAM EATER just to protect him????  
You’ve always been a worrier

Right. Those were...not lies. But it wasn’t like Kairi really had to go and call him out on them, or make them into such a big deal. The sudden blush on Riku’s face was so vibrant and all-consuming that it actually _hurt_. 

**RIKU** :   
I am NOT.

**KAIRI** :   
You totally are!   
If you could keep Sora in your pocket I bet you would  
It’s just that you know you can’t  
You know he has his own stuff, just like you do  
So all you can do is trust in him, right?

Riku grimaced, thumb frozen awkwardly over the gummiphone’s keyboard. Still true enough, he supposed: Riku had spent a very large chunk of time worrying over Sora, fighting to make certain he would be okay. The memory of him disappearing into shadow at the touch of Ansem’s Keyblade of Heart would forever haunt him, it seemed, though guilt wasn’t why he cared so much.

Sighing, Riku decided he was too tired to fight this. And also that he’d come too far to be so willfully difficult, or hide from reality.

**RIKU** :   
Why are you so smart?

**KAIRI** :   
Natural talent  
Also, you know…I understand this one more than most  
Waiting around, not being able to do anything? It really sucks   
):<

**RIKU** :   
Yeah. Yeah, it does.

**KAIRI** :   
But lucky for you, Riku!  
Your time isn’t as weird as it could be  
It’s been nearly a whole day for me since the start of this convo  
But I’m guessing it hasn’t been that long for you?

**RIKU** :   
NO, THANK GOODNESS.  
HOW DO YOU MANAGE TO COMMENT SO NORMALLY IF THIS IS WHAT YOU’RE DEALING WITH???

**KAIRI** :   
I said it once, I’ll say it again  
Natural talent ;D

Riku shook his head, and even though he felt a little guilty about it now, knowing exactly how difficult it must be for Kairi and Axel in the Secret Forest, connected but still separate from the rest of their friends, Riku was admittedly a little too focused on not feeling sorry for himself. So he closed out of his gummiphone and forced himself to his feet, scrounging around for his shirt and socks in the dark.

He couldn’t stand to stay still, waiting for the rest of the world to catch up. 

Whatever issues he was still having with Braveheart, Riku would work them out. And if the Coliseum’s weird grasp on time made it easier to do so without putting the rest of the worlds on pause, then all the better. Even if that meant a lack of Sora’s smile and his brilliant blue eyes and all of his easy assurances that everything would be okay. Wincing, Riku paused in hunting for his boots to rub at his chest, as if that might stem the ache from all these gossamer feelings, tentative and strange and intangible, yet strong all the same. 

The rubbing didn’t help even a little, and Riku marveled all over again at how hard this was going to be. At least he could trust that Kairi would understand his sudden silence. 

In fact--

An alert trumpeted from his phone as Riku was attempting to tie his laces by feel, rather than sight. Set next to him, the glow of the alert helped him out, and Riku took a moment before attempting the other boot to see what Kairi had to say.

**KAIRI** :   
Good luck, Riku (:

**RIKU** :   
Thanks. Good luck to you, too, Kairi. :)

\---

By the time they’d reached the Coliseum the night before, it had been late enough for the torches to be the only available light, turning the place into glimmering gold and burnished sand, dramatic shadows on the myriad statues creating a foreboding visage. Riku had been far too tired by then to have much of an opinion on it, and distracted as well by his first meeting with Phil. Not that it had been much of a meeting, really, with Riku so tired and Phil so focused on his old pupil. Hercules had made one vague attempt to head back to Thebes before Phil kicked him in the ankle and bullied him into staying.

“Ungrateful brats, every single one,” he’d muttered. “I give up the best years of my life to you, and what do I get in return? Nothing! You go and forget me, oh yeah, I see how it is--”

“Phil,” Hercules whined, wilting under the onslaught.

Funny how heroes always seemed to be weak towards their friends, Riku had thought, smiling fuzzily and listing slightly to the side, soft and warm and fond with the sentiment because it made him think of Sora. Mickey kept making quiet little squeaks of dismay and tugging him upright again, but it had been a losing battle. Luckily, Phil had quickly gotten Mickey and Riku squared away for the night as soon as a sheepish Hercules agreed to stay and catch up.

Despite his delirium and the Sora-inspired softness, Riku had still gotten the impression that Phil hadn’t seemed to like him very much -- though perhaps that was just the satyr’s way, considering he’d even given King Mickey a rather nasty side-eye. But Riku supposed he could afford to be hopeful about the future, rather than pessimistic. Or at least _try_ to be. 

Except that after a full night’s rest and the conversation with Kairi to shake any lingering cobwebs in his brain free, Riku found Phil’s temperament to be...even worse than before, unfortunately. 

“I don’t like the look of you,” he grumbled, glaring at Riku.

Riku could feel his eyebrows scooching upward at the frosty reception. The mild optimism Riku had managed to scrounge up took an abrupt nosedive into _miffed_ , which he struggled not to give in to. “That seems awfully short sighted,” he finally said, rather than any of the snide remarks that had popped immediately into his head. 

“Oh, dear,” Mickey muttered, ears drooping.

And, look -- Riku definitely hadn’t _meant_ to make a short joke, and he certainly hadn’t _known_ that Phil would be sensitive to them. But Riku also would have been a lying liar that lied if he said he didn’t feel some satisfaction in watching Phil puff up and turn red and sputter indignantly.

“Now, Phil,” Hercules said, raising both hands in a placating gesture. “I’m sure Riku didn’t mean--”

The resulting tirade was genuinely impressive.

\---

So, Phil hated his guts.

That was great, considering he was meant to be the best trainer worlds over, helping Hercules and Sora both on their paths to greatness. Riku scuffed a mark onto the marble floor of one of the award rooms, trying not to feel too frustrated. “I didn’t mean to start something,” he told Mickey. 

“I know,” Mickey said. 

“I really didn’t. It’s just-- The way he looked at me, you know? Like he knew all my dirty secrets.”

“You don’t _have_ any dirty secrets, Riku.”

Riku grimaced, working on making the scuff mark bigger and darker. “Feels like I do,” he muttered. “Any time I meet someone new, or someone that I last met when I was on Maleficent’s side.”

“You’ve been a champion of light for _ages_ ,” was Mickey’s protest.

And it was a good point, one Riku prided himself on. One that had allowed those he was closest to some measure of peace, he thought. At least, it usually gave _Riku_ some peace, knowing how far he’d come from the angry, lost boy he used to be. But it didn’t delete that boy from existence, either; all those choices were still a part of Riku, a reality he couldn’t ignore. He said, “But they don’t know that. Or even if they do, it’s not always easy to believe it. And look, I get it, all right? I’m still making up for what I did. It’s fine if people don’t like me--”

“I like you,” Mickey said, tone earnest. “Sora likes you! Megara likes you! Kairi--”

From the doorless entrance, Phil grunted: “Seems Herc likes you, too, though hell if I know why. If you’re done belly aching about all your sad and tragic woes, kid, come on out and let me get the measure of you.”

Riku blinked, staring down at the really ugly and obvious scuff mark he’d managed to get going. Then he stepped hurriedly atop it, hoping Phil wouldn’t notice, and stared at the satyr in bemusement. Phil had his arms crossed, an expression of deep annoyance etched across his face. “Are you serious?” Riku asked. “You’ll train me?”

“It’s what I _do_ , kid,” Phil sniffed. 

“Thank you,” Riku said, feeling the sentiment burn through his chest, tighten his throat. Even the discomfort of knowing that Phil had heard at least part of Riku’s conversation with Mickey couldn’t keep relief from sweeping through him, sudden and fierce. _Finally_. Maybe now Riku would be able to make some progress, enough to help rather than hinder their efforts.

Phil narrowed his eyes at him, completely ignoring Mickey beaming off to the side, the king obviously pleased at Phil’s decision. “Heh. On second thought…” Phil pointed at the ugly scuff, not at all hidden by Riku’s boots. “First order of business, clean that mark off my floor!” 

“Hm,” said Riku, eyeing the size of it and wanting, rather desperately, for his training to begin immediately. “Don’t suppose you’d believe it was here when we arrived?”

Phil’s face darkened. He turned on one tiny hoof to stomp back the way he came, hollering over his shoulder: “Actually, clean the whole damn floor! This room better be spotless by the time I get back!”

Riku looked at Mickey. “Oops.”

Mickey winked. “How about I use a watera on it for you?”

“Thank yo--”

“NO CHEATING,” came Phil’s voice, loud enough to startle both Riku and Mickey. “YOU THINK I’M NOT WISE TO THE WAYS OF WANNABE HEROES LIKE YOU? HOW ARE YOU EVER GOING TO LEARN ANYTHING IF YOU DON’T START TAKING SOME PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOURSELF?!”

Mickey whistled. “Wow.”

“Uh.” Riku blinked, a little overwhelmed. “I guess I’ll...go find a mop, or something?”

\---

Phil kept him cleaning all day, which was pretty much torture. But Riku grit his teeth and managed not to say anything disastrous again, which was good, since Hercules had departed for Thebes and its rebuilding effort that afternoon. Mickey had gone with him under the guise of escorting the hero back, though Riku had little doubt the king would be picking at Hercules’ brain for any memories of their missing guardians.

Riku didn’t know how long it would take for Mickey to return, not once he was back outside the Coliseum’s influence. A day out there might be two or more for Riku, but if that were true, then Riku supposed he’d just have to deal.

Alone.

With Phil’s muttering and rude hollering and lazy, caustic insults about Riku’s work ethic.

On the upside, it seemed Sora hadn’t lingered in Twilight Town for long. With his return to the gummiship and the Sea of Stars, at least Riku had a little time to chat with him like normal. The Sea of Stars had _no_ concept of time, but for once that was working in Riku and Sora’s favor. As soon as he found out that Riku had safely arrived, Sora called Riku’s gummiphone and demanded to speak with Phil.

Riku had, a little disgruntled at being passed up for a cantankerous bully.

But watching the way Phil smiled and hearing him huff with worry and ask after Sora’s health, Riku was feeling a _little_ less annoyed about everything. Phil obviously cared about Sora, which Riku could not fault him for, and completely understood.

Still, _Riku_ would have liked to be the one chatting on the phone with him, thank you very much.

“Heh,” Phil grinned, shaking his head down at the dark screened gummiphone after their conversation concluded. “That kid. He’s a good guy, a damn fine junior hero! A bit of a scatterbrain, but you know, so is Herc, and--” he caught sight of Riku, staring forlornly at his phone “--oi! What’re you doing standing around like a lump?! These hallways aren’t going to sweep themselves!”

“Sure,” Riku said. “But I need that back--”

“Ah ah,” Phil said, waggling it above his head tauntingly. “You want this? Well too bad, chump! Not until-- whoa, hey! WHAT--?!”

“Yeah, no,” Riku told him, phone back in his pocket and tone dry. “Sorry. I’ll keep doing your chores if you want, but I’m not letting you keep my phone.”

It was kind of funny that Phil really hadn’t expected Riku to just step over and take his phone back. Guy was short enough and waving it about, it was an easy retrieval. Also, there was simply no way Riku was going to give up this link to Sora. The heaviness he’d felt that morning learning of the Coliseum’s skewed time was now fully dissipated, banished by Sora’s return. Riku smiled a little, even though it made Phil go an interesting shade of red. 

Riku...probably shouldn’t take a picture of Phil yelling at him. 

Right?

Eh, what the hell, Riku decided.

\---

**RIKU** :

_A photo of Phil red and sweating, mouth unflatteringly open as he yells._

Look, I made a new friend.  
#he hates me #if you never hear from me again this is why #the lung capacity is honestly impressive #coliseum #phil #wannabe heroes r us

_comments:_  
 **SORA** : omg you are so dead  
 **KAIRI** : Rikuuuuu what’re you doing  
 **RIKU** : Nothing.  
 **SORA** : what a load of crap lol  
 **SORA** : i’ll miss you when phil murders you and hides the body  
 **KAIRI** : I call dibs on the eulogy!  
 **RIKU** : Neither of you are invited to my funeral.

\---

In retaliation to Riku’s ill-timed candid, the satyr spent twenty minutes spitting olive pits onto the floor Riku was supposed to be cleaning.

“Are you serious right now?!” Riku asked, clutching at his broom. This was worse than death, he decided. The tiny, squishy pits were nearly impossible to sweep up. His hands tightened as Phil popped another olive into his mouth, lounging on a convenient ledge. 

It wouldn’t do Riku any good to break the broom in a fit, right? And it probably wouldn’t do him any good to call on Braveheart and _throw it at Phil_ , either, even if Riku really wanted to.

Like...really, _really_ wanted to.

Instead, Riku took a deep, calming breath. “Whatever,” he said. “That’s fine. Do whatever you want, it won’t-- it doesn’t bother _me_ any.”

Phil spat out another olive pit, grinning nastily.

The broomstick snapped in half.

_Damn_ it.

\---

It wasn’t until Riku was eating dinner, worn and weary and without having brought out his keyblade even once, that Riku was able to pull his phone back out. He would have liked to call Sora, to see his face on the screen and drink him in like an oasis in the desert. But Riku knew how small that gummiship was, and he didn’t much care to risk Donald or Goofy seeing--

Something.

Whatever it was that Riku, as of now, was officially too tired and cranky to be worried about. 

_YOU MESSAGED SORA DIRECTLY:_  
 **RIKU** :   
So tell me, does this Phil guy hate everyone equally or did you tell him something awful about me?  
‘Cause I know I haven’t exactly helped matters, but he definitely started off hating my guts.  
Should I sleep with one eye open?  
I’m afraid he’s going to headbutt me and poke my eyes out with those nubby horns of his.

**SORA** :   
whaaaaaat??   
i didn’t say anything!!!

**RIKU** :   
You sure? What’ve you told him about me??

**SORA** :   
uhhhhhhhh  
i dunno, nothing??  
I CANT REMMEBER EVERYTHING I SAY OKAY

**RIKU** :   
You are zero help.

**SORA** :   
that’s okay!!!  
phil will turn you from a zero………

**RIKU** :   
Wait. What is happening right now?

**SORA** :   
………….TO A HERO  
:D :D :D :D :D

**RIKU** :   
I regret so much.

Even as he typed it, Riku was painfully aware of how widely he was smiling.

\---

Thankfully, there were no more chores foisted upon Riku the following morning. Phil led him out instead to the Coliseum grounds, where a bunch of empty crates and barrels were stacked off to the sides, and a weird sort of obstacle course made up of platforms and ropes and wooden beams had been set up. Riku frowned at it, squinting in the bright, early morning light.

“This ought to keep you out of trouble for a bit,” Phil said, sounding pleased.

Riku, instinctively wary of any and all barrels now, thanks to all those videos of Sora being stupidly attractive around them, took a moment to calm his heart and flip-flopping stomach enough to reply. “...What am I supposed to be doing here, exactly?”

“See those?” Phil asked, pointing at the cursed barrels.

“...Unfortunately.”

“Take those and move them onto the obstacle course. Stack ‘em, line ‘em up, whatever. Just make sure you get every surface covered in barrels and crates, kapeesh?”

Riku stared down at Phil’s bald head. “I’d really rather not.”

“Too bad,” Phil snorted, glaring up at him. “What? You think you’re better than Herc or your buddy Sora?”

“No,” Riku protested. “But-- You’ve got to be kidding me. _This_ is your idea of heroic training?!”

Barrels.

So _many_ barrels.

Riku felt dizzy just looking at them. The sun suddenly felt hotter, brighter, burning against his skin. Riku shifted uncomfortably beneath the weight of his jacket, and didn’t blame himself at all when the prospect of a long morning -- and even longer afternoon, probably -- moving all these crates and barrels by hand made him feel a little like crying. 

“Look, kid,” Phil said, tone surprisingly solemn. “I don’t know you. I don’t really care about you, either. I’m only doing this ‘cause you’re Sora’s friend. He's helped us out in more than a few tight spots, so it seems the least I can do when _his_ buddy's in a pinch. But let me give you a single word of warning, bucko -- don't piss me off!"

"A single word, huh?"

"Thinks he's funny," Phil grumped, and Riku felt a flicker of shame shiver in his gut. “I give him a place to rest his head, call in favors so he has a chance at a real fight, and this is the thanks I get? Freaking wannabe heroes, all the same!”

“Wait,” said Riku, that flicker of shame guttering out, replaced by interest. “A real fight? Like what?”

But Phil hadn’t gone into further detail, muttering and stomping off. Riku was left alone, surrounded by empty seats, faced with splinters and sweat and aching muscles, and the embarrassing reality that Riku probably wasn’t going to be able to stop thinking about those stupid barrel videos the whole while.

Thinking about _Sora_.

How pretty he was. How strong. How bright and charming and ridiculous and--

“Help,” Riku said weakly. “How do I turn off my brain?!”

The barrels did not answer.

\---

At least Phil planned to have Riku destroy all of his hard labor that day, after Riku was allowed to rinse off and then ordered to eat and drink something. Riku took a photo of the training grounds, liberally packed with inanimate objects destined for destruction, and asked What would constitute a real fight in this place? #phil won't say #coliseum #training

 **SORA** : HERCULES HERCULES  
 **GOOFY** : Garwsh, I would say the Titans, but we already took care of them!  
 **DONALD** : that stupid dog!

The comments weren’t particularly helpful, and Phil _still_ wasn’t letting any hints drop. After Riku’s lunch, the satyr timed how long it took for Riku to whack apart all the crates and barrels. By the end of it, Riku’s shoulder was sore and his balance was still shit _and_ he had a sunburn on the back of his neck and the tops of his ears.

“Wow, kid,” Phil said, “that was awful.”

Riku just grimaced, not allowing himself to rub at his aching shoulder where Phil could see his discomfort.

He only hoped whoever Phil had in mind was worth waiting around for. Because Braveheart still felt strange, for all that the keyblade's grip had been formed expressly for Riku’s hand. The weight tugged, and Riku felt constantly as though he were on the verge of falling. He didn't understand it, why there was any difference between this keyblade and Way to the Dawn. And that was the problem, wasn’t it? He’d gone and grown somehow, in a way he didn’t yet understand. And he _needed_ to understand. Everyone was counting on him to find Aqua, to help against Xehanort and the Darkness and--

“All right,” Phil said, tone even. “No need to look so glum, Sora’ll pout at me if he thinks I made you cry.”

“I’m not going to _cry_ ,” Riku grit out.

Phil just shrugged, scratching casually at an ear. “Wouldn’t be a big deal if you did, kid. Except for the Sora angle. Can’t handle having those baby blues staring accusingly at me. Bad for my heart. So buck up, chump. We’ll get you through this.”

Riku stared in surprise. “Wait. Are you...You’re being nice. What is happening?”

“Yeah, well,” Phil sniffed. “I’m a soft touch for hopeless cases, I guess. Your form is _terrible_ , and you’re way too focused on everything that’s going wrong to figure out how to make it go _right_. I don’t know much about keyblades, I’ll admit, but I do know something about the heart -- you gotta listen to it, y’know?”

Riku blinked. “Uh. Right.”

Phil nodded, thoughtfully looking Riku up and down. “Yeah, you suck at that, kid. _Big_ time. But it’s fine. We’ll get you out of your head by working you so hard you can’t hold a thought in place. Now clean this mess up and get to bed!”

Without waiting for a reply, Phil turned and stomped away.

That hadn’t at all been what Riku’d expected, the sudden shift in Phil’s demeanor that meant that the satyr actually _was_ a half-way decent coach. He’d been measuring Riku, just like he’d talked about doing the afternoon before. Riku wanted to trust him, to believe that he could actually help Riku have a breakthrough, but it was a difficult thing for Riku to do.

He never had trusted easy, much to his own regret.

By the time Riku finished for the night, the stars were out and his feet were dragging as he made his way back to his makeshift room. It was cramped and dusty, but Riku had stayed in far worse places. At least it was dry. And free of heartless. _And_ Riku had remembered to grab an oil lamp to bring with him, so at least he wouldn’t be shut in complete darkness this time.

With a gusty sigh, Riku flopped onto his waiting bedding and pulled out his gummiphone.

**RIKU** : 

_A close up picture of a broken barrel._

How many barrels do you need to bust before you work out whatever it is that's bothering you?  
#training #it never ends #all barrels should be destroyed on sight #coliseum

_comments:_  
 **SORA** : HAHHAHAHA  
 **SORA** : I feel your pain :|  
 **RIKU** : /siiiiiiiiigh 

Did he?

Riku doubted it, suddenly, because the combination of Sora and barrels was making Riku’s chest go tight, an unknown expression twisting across his face. He had daydreamed of Sora today -- not as much as he feared, but plenty enough. Thought of his hair, his stubborn chin, the way he laughed. Thought about lemons deftly tossed into the air, the easy strength he displayed hanging from a roof’s edge one handed, the effortless compassion.

Sora, Sora, _Sora_.

Riku’s heart was beating an unfamiliar rhythm, one he was still learning. Phil was right. Though Riku had gotten better at listening to his heart, it still wasn’t easy. But he wanted...something. 

Heartmarks and #wishing you were here and--

_YOU MESSAGED SORA DIRECTLY:_  
 **RIKU** :   
How do you listen to your heart?

**SORA** :   
???

**RIKU** :   
You told me that my heart has probably changed, and that’s why I’m having trouble with Braveheart. Because I’m trying to use it the same way I used Way to the Dawn.   
But Phil says I suck at listening to my heart and I think he’s right. 

**SORA** :   
it is still sooooo weird when you ask me for advice hahaha

**RIKU** :   
):<

**SORA** :   
i don’t know, riku   
and don’t yell at me i know that doesn’t help  
but you just…….  
you have to feel it?

Riku stared at the screen, wondering how in all the worlds Sora could possibly think that was at all any kind of explanation.

**RIKU** :   
Feel it???

**SORA** :  
yeahhh i mean  
you can think about it and listen and stuff but don’t forget what you’re listening to and thinking about, you know?  
feelings and emotions!!!

**RIKU** :   
No kidding.

**SORA** :   
):<  
hey you asked  
not my fault if you don’t like the answer

**RIKU** :   
Ugh. Fine.  
But why is that so hard for me?

**SORA** :   
you’re repressed :D

**RIKU** :   
Why do you know that word? ):<

**SORA** :   
blame kairi haha  
but dude riku buddy  
stop being so hard on yourself  
you’re a keyblade master!! you’re awesome!!   
and look  
it’s not like i’m doing so swell over here  
>:

**RIKU** :   
You’re doing fine.

**SORA** :   
oh wow  
WOW what high praise  
fine he says i’m doing fINE

**RIKU** :   
Omg.

**SORA** :   
FIIIIIIIIINE  
IM SIRE THATLL BE GOOD ENOIGH GO SAVE ALL TGE WORLDS ANDUSKQIE

**RIKU** :   
Sora, calm down!

**SORA** :   
i wish i was doing better than fine  
wanna know a secret? i still don’t like admitting i can’t do something  
i asked herc though how he got his powers back and he said “with all my heart”  
and i still haven’t figured it out

Riku stared at the little icon of Sora’s face next to his messages, an adorable, cartoonish rendering of Sora’s handsome face. 

Obviously he knew Sora had his flaws. Riku had _grown up_ with Sora, spent their childhood pressing and prodding those negative aspects; known well enough how to manipulate him when Riku had turned to the Darkness. It was just...so easy to forget, sometimes, that Sora was just a person. Imperfect, fallible, sometimes too stubborn for anybody’s good. Riku felt guilty, suddenly, for the flavor of his more recent thoughts -- he’d been so focused on all of Sora’s appeal that he’d forgotten to look at him properly, to remember that Sora sometimes went and cooked gourmet meals with a rat just so he had someone to talk about his worries with, probably in part because Sora really _did_ still have trouble admitting difficulty at times. 

In his chest, Riku’s heart swelled and squeezed, hot and violent, protective and grateful. Flaws didn’t make Riku like Sora any less, apparently, but that was no surprise.

**RIKU** :   
You will. You always do, Sora.

**SORA** :   
and so do you riku 

The squeezing and swelling didn’t get better. It got worse instead, and it seemed a weird thing to feel grateful for: this ache that hurt so bad it made Riku’s eyes sting. A longing and sadness so soft that Riku never noticed it creeping near, close enough to hobble him. Riku wanted to push the feeling away, to gain better control, but -- _you have to feel it_.

Riku took a moment to just close his eyes and breathe.

_I miss you_ , he wanted to say. _I miss you more than I ever have before. Something has changed and I don’t know what it is, but I’m trying to be brave. I’m trying to understand. But it’s hard to listen when all I can think about is how much I wish you were here._

**RIKU** :   
Thanks.   
You feel better after getting to rant a bit?

**SORA** :   
yes >_>;

**RIKU** :   
Good.  
And Sora?

**SORA** :   
??

**RIKU** :   
You’re doing great. (:

**SORA** :   
AWW WHO IS THIS NICE GUY HUH

**RIKU** :   
Don’t make me take it back!

**SORA** :   
NU UH TOO LATE TGE PRAISE JS MIIIIIBE

**RIKU** :   
I’m going to revoke your capslock privileges.  
Your typos are atrocious!

**SORA** :   
:p

\---

In the morning, Riku once again indulged in his new routine of scrolling through the gummiphone’s feed before getting out of bed. The fact that his whole body ached even after he’d used a generous cura on himself definitely didn’t encourage him to hurry. He groaned instead, only squinting his eyes open enough to search for any new posts by Sora.

And, wow -- that was embarrassing.

Tired and grumpy, all Riku wanted was Sora, as if he was some sort of balm to Riku’s soul. 

Really, incredibly embarrassing. But also? Riku didn’t care. Sora was on his way to a new world. A new world meant new pictures, further points of contact for Riku to gather close, hold in his heart while he and Sora were apart. Riku was somewhat surprised by his own neediness, but then, never before had he been made so acutely aware of what he was missing every time he and Sora were on different adventures.

Today, what Riku had been missing was terror, apparently.

**SORA** :

_A picture of a massive, many turreted Heartless ship through the cockpit window._

O_O   
#whoa 

Riku very nearly dropped the gummiphone on his face again. 

He lurched upright on his cot before he could, heart pounding. That ship was huge, a veritable behemoth of an enemy. As accomplished a pilot as Sora was, Riku couldn't help the instinctive fear that rose up within him at even the _thought_ of Sora tangling with it. The fact that this post was from hours ago, with nothing else having been added since, did not help allay that fear.

Riku tapped the screen so frantically he nearly jammed his thumb.

_comments_  
 **CHIP &DALE**: NO  
 **CHIP &DALE**: SAY IT AIN'T SO  
 **GOOFY** : Don't worry, Sora's performing evasive maneuvers to avoid it!  
 **DONALD** : im goiig to puke  
 **GOOFY** : At least our seat belts are on!  
 **IENZO** : Stay safe!!  
 **CHIP &DALE**: OUR DISPLAY IS GOING NUTS OVER HERE  
 **CHIP &DALE**: IT'S STILL GOING NUTS  
 **CHIP &DALE**: SPEAK TO US WHAT'S GOING ON  
 **CHIP &DALE**: ???????!!!!!?????????  
 **MICKEY** : Oh, gosh! Are you all right?!  
 **CHIP &DALE**: OUR SYSTEMS ARE REPORTING DAMAGE BUT NOTHING CRITICAL  
 **CHIP &DALE**: OUR BEST GUESS IS THEY WENT STRAIGHT FROM BATTLE INTO A VORTEX AND HAVEN'T COME OUT YET

The fear didn't diminish. For Mickey and the rest, it had only been moments since the post. But Riku knew the truth of it -- or was it merely what Kairi had to deal with, hours stretching into days while she waited for the next word to be spoken? Riku didn’t know which to hope for; they both seemed terrible possibilities. Ignoring the tremble in his hands, Riku stopped wondering and called Sora directly. 

The gummiphone rang and rang and rang but Sora never picked up. 

Riku sat there in the dark, waiting to hear Sora's voice, to see his face. But it wasn't happening. Five minutes passed, then ten, then _twenty_ , and Riku kept calling; the phone rang, rang, rang, rang--

And then it didn’t.

Instead, Sora's face appeared on the screen. 

"Oh, hi Riku! I didn't expect... Uh. Wait, Riku? Are you there? Why's it so dark?!"

_Alive_. Sora was alive and talking to him, he was _fine_. For a moment, Riku felt powerless, completely undone. All he could do was close his eyes tight and breathe in unevenly, the relief a great, choking swell in his throat. 

"Rikuuuu, is that the Dark World? I didn't expect it to be so...dark. I can't even see you!"

"Is the king there?!"

"Wha-- hey, no! We are so not doing this again, guys. Riku called _me_! If you want to talk to his majesty then do it on your own gummiphones, don't go hogging mine all the--"

"Sora," Riku muttered, still with his eyes closed. "You're an idiot."

"Ha!"

"Shut up, Donald!" Sora wailed, sounding annoyed. 

Annoyed, but definitely still alive. _Safe_. Riku's breath kept shuddering in and out of his lungs as his heart calmed down. What was it Kairi had called him? A worrier? He hoped she never learned of Riku’s reaction, because there’d be no arguing with her after.

"Why're you calling me names, Riku? What'd I do?!"

"Check your last post," Riku said. " _I'm_ going back to bed. Some idiot sapped all my energy as soon as I woke up."

"What!? Who?!"

Finally, Riku opened his eyes and brought the gummiphone close enough that the screen's glow might light up his face, revealing Riku's thoroughly unimpressed expression. Sora's turned sheepish.

"Oh. You meant me."

Donald, off screen, was laughing.

Riku rolled his eyes and ended the call. Now that he knew Sora was okay, he suddenly couldn't stand to look at him. It was too much. His heart might have calmed, but it still felt tender, turned feeble after the storm of fear. Grumbling, Riku laid back down and pulled his blanket back over his head, asleep again in seconds.

\---

_SORA MESSAGED YOU DIRECTLY:_  
 **SORA** :  
sorrrrrry. didnt mean to scare anyone!  
i barrel rolled us right into some small fry but like, a LOT of small fry  
took the first vortex i could find but you know time gets weird in there  
we're okay <3

 **RIKU** :  
Idiot.

**SORA** :   
yeah yeah so you said  
your bedhead was awesome by the way

**RIKU** :  
>:|

**SORA** :   
sooooo cute   
& fluffy!

**RIKU** :  
I'm going to block you. Can I block you? I'll find out!

**SORA** :  
wait forgive me first!!!  
D:  
i really didnt mean to scare you  
thats why you called isnt it?  
cause i scared you

**RIKU** :  
Omg, seriously?  
Fine, yes. I was scared I would never see your goofy face again.  
Happy now?

**SORA** :  
kinda  
am i forgiven??

**RIKU** :  
Ugh. Yes. Forgiven.

**SORA** :  
yay!

**RIKU** :  
Sorry for calling you an idiot. I'm really glad you're okay.

**SORA** :   
(: no worries riku  
i woulda freaked out if it were you  
its all good

**RIKU** :  
<3

**SORA** :  
<3 !!

\---

When Riku finally emerged from the storage closet, he was feeling much better.

Unfortunately, he ran straight into Phil.

“You’re _late_ ,” the angry satyr complained, already puffed up and nearly vibrating with irritation. “What kind of hero are you planning to be, huh? The kind that sleeps in rather than saves the world?!”

“Uh.” Riku groped for words. “It...Sora…”

Phil’s face fell.

“No, no,” Riku hurried to explain, skin prickling at the look of deep sorrow that had flickered so readily over Phil’s features. “He’s okay! He is, he just...it took awhile to find out that he _was_ okay, is all. I uh, I got a little distracted.”

“Yeah, okay,” Phil puffed out a sigh of relief, shoulders loosening. “I get that, kid. I do! But while you’re busy being distracted you’re not training, and if you’re not training then you’re not getting any better, and if you don’t get better? How are you gonna help when Sora _really_ needs you, hm?”

Riku grimaced. “I see your point.”

“Heh, good. Now c’mon. Your training partner showed up early and he gives me the creeps, all right? The sooner we get you up to snuff the quicker I can toss him out of my Coliseum. _Again_.”

“Who is it?” Riku asked, following along as Phil led them quickly through the halls.

Phil’s tail twitched in distaste. “Cloud Strife.”

Surprise widened Riku’s eyes and brought him to a halt, Phil’s hooves clacking away against the marble floors, leaving him behind. But...whoa. Sora had told both Riku and Kairi about Cloud during that brief time before their Mastery Exams, when they’d tried so hard to fill in the missing pieces of their tales. The way Sora had spoken about Cloud, who had once been an enemy before becoming a reliable ally…

“This is gonna be interesting,” Riku decided, a smirk tugging at his mouth. He hurried to catch up with Phil, already sliding his gummiphone out of his pocket to message Sora directly.

**RIKU** :   
Got any tips on how to beat Cloud Strife?

**SORA** :   
HOLY CRAP  
ARE YOU SERIOUS??  
THAT’S AWESOME  
OMG TELL HIMI SAID HO ASK HOW HE IS

**RIKU** :   
Slow down!

**SORA** :   
GOOD LUCK RIKU  
TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT

**RIKU** :   
You didn’t answer my question!!

**SORA** :   
YOULL DO GREAT

Sighing, Riku went to put his phone away, especially as the bright rectangle of light leading to the training grounds was growing nearer, and the last thing Riku felt like dealing with at the moment was more of Phil’s yelling, but before he could Kairi’s icon popped up in the corner of his screen, vibrating in excitement. 

Riku clicked on it, feeling a moment of guilt at not having messaged her earlier, to see how she’d dealt with Sora’s disappearing act. It was probably why she was messaging _him_ , to make certain he was okay--

Nope.

Not that, not at all.

**KAIRI** :   
SORA TOLD ME YOU’RE GONNA FIGHT CLOUD  
I NEED PICTURES  
RIKU TAKE A PICTURE FOR ME PLS  
I NEED IT

**RIKU** :   
Omg.

**KAIRI** :   
DO IT DO IT DO IT DO IT  
ALL I HAVE TO LOOK AT HERE ARE THREE GOOD FAIRIES AND AXEL’S SAD FACE  
LET ME LIIIIIIVE

**RIKU** :   
?????

**KAIRI** :   
Sora says he’s very pretty D;

Riku...blinked, his hand tightening around his gummiphone. He didn’t much like the lick of jealousy that sparked up through his gut, along his spine. That Sora was calling people pretty like it was the easiest thing, when Riku wanted him to think that about-- about _him_ , and him alone. Which wasn’t a thing Riku had known about himself until _right this second_ , and the timing really could not have been worse, because all of a sudden he was outside, under the sun and in the heat and squinting through it to find Cloud Strife waiting for him.

Oh.

Oh, wow.

Feeling a little numb, Riku lifted his hand, thumb moving automatically to pull up the camera option. Cloud twitched when the very quiet noise of the shutter happened, but Riku ignored him.

He attached the picture with his next message to Kairi.

**RIKU** :   
His eyes freaking GLOW.

**KAIRI** :   
Omgggggggggggggggg

**RIKU** :   
What even. What is he? WHY IS HE SO PRETTY.

**KAIRI** :   
I DON’T KNOW BUT PLS TAKE MORE PHOTOS OMGGGGG

“Are you...done?” Cloud asked.

Riku glanced up to see Phil shaking his head and heading off toward the stands. Reluctantly, Riku pocketed his phone and came closer, close enough to see that it wasn’t a trick of the light, Cloud’s eyes really _did_ glow, green at the center and electric blue at the edges. That blue reminded him of Sora, actually, and Riku had no idea how to feel anymore.

Sora had called Cloud pretty, a fact Riku couldn’t deny.

He _still_ didn’t like it though.

“I haven’t even started,” Riku said, flexing his hand to call upon Braveheart.

His opponent watched with sharp eyes, though his neutral expression gave nothing away. “That’s a big weapon,” he said mildly. “You sure you’re strong enough to carry the weight?”

And that was the question, wasn’t it? His hand tightened on Braveheart’s hilt, tension turning his muscles hard and stiff. That wasn’t conducive to fighting, but at this point it’d become instinctive: a wariness toward his own weapon. It felt like failure already, though Riku refused to admit defeat; only arched his brows, looking pointedly at the massive sword strapped to Cloud’s back. “I could say the same to you.”

Faintly, Cloud smiled. His folded arms fell and he reached back for the handle of his sword, swinging it with ease down into a ready position. “This should be fun,” he said. And then--

Riku _almost_ got Braveheart up in time.

“Fast,” Riku gasped. The force of Cloud’s blow -- with the flat of his blade, rather than the sharp edge -- had sent Riku careening back into the wall, clear out of the ring. “How is he so _fast_.”

“You really don’t wanna know,” Cloud said, from right beside him.

Riku froze, eyes wide.

A split second, and then Riku got his body to listen again, scrabbling out of the way just as Cloud’s sword came down in an earth shaking strike, edge lodging into the ground at least three inches deep. 

Right where Riku had been crouched.

\---

**RIKU** :

_A picture of Cloud’s Buster Sword leaning against the wall._

I’m pretty sure this thing weighs as much as I do.  
#how does he move so fast #i was almost filleted #everything hurts #cloud strife #training

_comments_  
 **KAIRI** : Does he throw it at you??  
 **KAIRI** : Axel won’t stop throwing chakrams at MY FACE  
 **LEA** : hey hey i’m just doing my part, princess  
 **LEA** : you can’t tell me you haven’t gotten good at dodging  
 **KAIRI** : Those points HURT  
 **LEA** : consider it incentive ;)  
 **SORA** : oh maaaan yeah  
 **SORA** : nothing quite so terrifying as clud swinging that thing at you haha  
 **SORA** : clOud  
 **KAIRI** : Riku?  
 **SORA** : rikuuuuuu where’d you go  
 **LEA** : he’s probably busy?  
 **KAIRI** : RIKU COME TELL US MORE  
 **SORA** : I WANNA HEAR ABOUT IT  
 **SORA** : CMON RIKKKUUU  
 **KAIRI** : R I K U ! !  
 **CLOUD** : he fell asleep  
 **CLOUD** : in his food  
 **SORA** : GHASGH  
 **SORA** : CLOUD YOU HAVE A GUMMIPHONE???  
 **CLOUD** : nah, but cid got my PHS updated  
 **CLOUD** : i don’t get on it much  
 **KAIRI** : Hi!! It’s nice to meet you!!!!!  
 **SORA** : HOW HAVE YOU BEEN??  
 **CLOUD** : fine  
 **CLOUD** : nice to meet you too kairi  
 **SORA** : THIS IS AMAZIIIING  
 **SORA** : so tell me tell me how’d riku do??  
 **CLOUD** : hm  
 **SORA** : D:  
 **KAIRI** : ????  
 **CLOUD** : he’s got his work cut out for him  
 **KAIRI** : Will you help him?  
 **CLOUD** : if i can  
 **SORA** : you can  
 **SORA** : and riku can do this, you’ll see  
 **SORA** : he’s amazing  
 **KAIRI** : (:  
 **CLOUD** : you really care about him don’t you?  
 **SORA** : of course i do!  
 **RIKU** : HELLO, CAN WE NOT DO THIS ON MY POST??   
**KAIRI** : G’morning sunshine :D  
 **RIKU** : No.  
 **CLOUD** : nice bedhead  
 **SORA** : THAT’S WHAT I SAID  
 **KAIRI** : ……………  
 **CLOUD** : wow  
 **CLOUD** : that’s a blush  
 **RIKU** : SHUT UP.  
 **RIKU** : I WILL DELETE THIS POST.  
 **SORA** : ?????  
 **LEA** : i seriusly need some popcorn   
**KAIRI** : XD;

\---

The next morning, Riku stomped out to the training grounds.

Phil took one look at his expression and gave a long, low whistle. “That’s cute, kid,” he called, lounging up on the stands -- farther up than he had yesterday, when he’d almost gotten crushed by Riku’s body one of the _many_ times Cloud sent him flying. “But if you think anger’s gonna help, then you’ve already lost!”

“Oh?” said Cloud, smiling slightly. “You’re not still upset about last night, are you?”

“ _No_ ,” Riku grit out.

He hadn’t, not really. It was more that Riku didn’t know what to do with himself and all his emotions. Didn’t know how to handle Sora’s casual care, his steadfast belief in Riku. Most definitely didn’t know how to feel about the way he’d reacted at Kairi’s prolonged ellipses, because it wasn’t like he and Sora and Kairi hadn’t had plenty of sleepovers throughout the years. They _all_ knew exactly how they looked first thing in the morning and--

Why had this felt different?

Why had _Kairi_ acted as though it were different?

Riku didn’t know; only knew that it _was_ different, somehow, and Sora might be the only person who wasn’t aware of it. Perhaps it was time to give in and ask for her advice, or at least try talking it out. A concept that Riku was still a little slow to grasp, it seemed, especially without Mickey around to give him those piercing, knowing stares that made Riku crack open and spill all his secrets.

“You’re distracted,” Cloud said, eyes narrowed. 

Riku blinked back to the real world, struggling to leave all his whirling thoughts behind. “It’s nothing,” he said. Lifting his hand, he called up Braveheart, the keyblade fitting neatly into his grasp. But the weight pulled immediately, tugging Riku forward, and damn it, _damn it_.

“Yeah,” Cloud scoffed. “Sure looks like nothing.”

Riku lost that fight, _and_ the next.

\---

**SORA** :

_A picture of a new world, seen through the gummiship’s cockpit and framed by Donald and Goofy making silly poses._

Guess where we’re headed?!  
#new world #new adventure #three half pints #donald #goofy 

_comments:_  
 **MICKEY** : Good luck, guys!  
 **IENZO** : I’m looking forward to the new data you’ll provide!  
 **IENZO** : Best of luck!  
 **DONALD** : I CAN’T WAIT TO GET OFF THIS SHIP  
 **CHIP &DALE**: HEY, WHAT’S WRONG WITH OUR SHIP?????  
 **DONALD** : SORA’S SNORES ECHO  
 **GOOFY** : Gawsh, I think I’ve gotten used to it. Don’t know if I can sleep without it now!  
 **SORA** : lies! all lies!!!!!!  
 **KAIRI** : HAHAHAHAHA  
 **KAIRI** : SO MUCH TRUTH  
 **KAIRI** : HIS NOSE IS SO SMALL AND CUTE HOW DOES HE SNORE SO LOUD???  
 **RIKU** : One of the great mysteries.  
 **SORA** : that’s it i’m getting new friends  
 **DONALD** : :p  
 **LEA** : kairi snores   
**LEA** : i can hear it through the walls lololol  
 **KAIRI** : THIS IS TRUE  
 **KAIRI** : You cannot shame me!  
 **SORA** : kairi has the most impressive snores okay  
 **SORA** : but noy me  
 **RIKU** : WE HAVE VIDEO EVIDENCE  
 **SORA** : LA LA LA NEW WORLD I CANT HEAR YOU  
 **SORA** : BYEEEE  
 **KAIRI** : XD have fun!!  
 **RIKU** : Try not to get into trouble. :p  
 **SORA** : noooo promises (:

\---

In fact, Riku lost every match against Cloud for the next two days. It was brutal. Humiliating. Riku wanted to throw Braveheart down Snow White’s well and then stuff it full of about five Large Body Heartless, cement it over, and forget about the whole thing. But he couldn’t, not when the stake of all the worlds rested on their shoulders. Riku was a Guardian of Light. If he wasn’t good enough, strong enough, capable enough--

“You know your problem, kid?” Phil said, pinky in an ear as he rooted around for wax.

Riku, who’d been contemplating the empty ring, mind overlaying the blank expanse with every mistake he’d made recently, glanced up at the satyr. “I can’t use my keyblade?” Riku huffed. “Yeah, thanks. Figured that one out myself.”

“Nah,” Phil dismissed. 

Riku waited, but when no further reply was forthcoming he grunted, shifted so he could narrow his eyes at Phil. “Then _what_. What’s my problem?”

“Aside from attitude?”

“Yes!”

Phil flicked away a ball of wax, looking utterly unsympathetic. “Using your head, it’s important. But using your heart? That’s how you become a hero.”

“How,” Riku asked, exasperated. “You say that like it’s easy, but-- but it’s not!”

And it wasn’t, for all that Riku wished it were. Once more, he was reminded of how far he’d come from the bitter idiot he’d once been, how much quieter his insecurities, his fears, the restless nagging voice constantly demanding _more_. He wasn’t Sora, though, for all he’d learned better how to adapt, to accept, to be happy with what he had and share that with the people around him.

Phil shrugged and began to trot away. “No one ever said it was easy.”

Riku groaned, sinking a hand into his hair to fist at the short locks. It wasn’t quite as gratifying with the new haircut, and probably just made it fluff up. Which made Riku think of Sora and his insistence that Riku’s bedhead was _cute and fluffy_. He groaned again, feeling his cheeks get pink. 

Maybe...

He pulled out his gummiphone.

_YOU MESSAGED KAIRI DIRECTLY:_  
 **RIKU** :   
Hey, so. Do your moods get weird when it’s been a while since you got to talk to everyone?

**KAIRI** :   
Well yeah  
That’s normal, isn’t it?  
But also when you say EVERYONE you raelly mean SORA, right????

**RIKU** :   
….How’s training going?

**KAIRI** :   
DON’T YOU CHANGE THE SUBJECT ON ME  
Here look  
 _attached image: a pot of tea sitting on a little table set with a plate of scones and lace doilies and a ceramic vase with a single daisy in it, steam from a single teacup drifting lazily into the air_  
Time for a tea time talk, Riku! :D

**RIKU** :   
Whoa, that’s...a really nice pic actually.  
Looks comfortable there.

**KAIRI** :   
Aside from being secreted away from everyone I care about and getting my butt kicked in training and feeling like I’m never going to be able to get strong enough to help ANYONE with ANYTHING….this place is pretty!!  
I’m back out on the porch right now  
I drank all the tea waiting for you to respond lol  
All I can see are trees and sky

**RIKU** :   
Haha, then if you drank all the tea already I get a pass!

**KAIRI** :   
Ha! You wish  
Tea or no tea I’m always here for you  
What’s on your mind, Riku??

**RIKU** :   
…..  
Aside from being away from everyone I care about and getting my butt kicked in training and feeling like I’m never going to be able to get strong enough to help ANYONE with ANYTHING, you mean?

**KAIRI** :   
(‘:

**RIKU** :   
Haha yeah, we’re dramatic.

**KAIRI** :   
Can’t help how we feel though, can we?

Riku paused, brows slowly furrowing as he thought about that -- _can’t help how we feel_. 

Feelings and emotions were tough, and Riku was still struggling to make sense of his heart. It was frustrating, annoying, embarrassing, but… He hadn’t considered the fact that it was okay that he couldn’t help the way he felt. Because the heart wasn’t an enemy to be defeated, was it? It simply was. And seeing it there in text with Kairi patient on the other line, waiting and supportive and understanding, gave him the strength he needed to say something about...all the other stuff. 

**RIKU** :   
Speaking of….feelings.

**KAIRI** :   
…..omg

**RIKU** :   
So I might uh...   
I might maybe…..

**KAIRI** :   
…...omG

**RIKU** :   
It’s just….  
I mean….  
WHY CAN’T I FINISH A SENTENCE???  
This is so embarrassing, forget it.

**KAIRI** :   
OMG IT’S HAPPENING  
NO CMON RIKU YOU CAN DO IT I BELIEVE IN YOU  
TAKE THE PLUNGE

**RIKU** :   
>_<

**KAIRI** :   
DOOOO IIIIIIIIIT

**RIKU** :   
SORA KEEPS MAKING ME FEEL WEIRD

**KAIRI** :   
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

**RIKU** :   
There. I said it.

**KAIRI** :   
/screaming  
 _attached image: a selfie of Kairi screaming into her pillow_

**RIKU** :   
…..You done?

**KAIRI** :   
For now :D  
Okay, so  
Weird how? >:3

**RIKU** :   
ghakgh;sghsg  
IF I KNEW THAT IT WOULDN’T BE WEIRD, WOULD IT?

**KAIRI** :  
I got more tea! And look! A cup for you!  
 _attached image: a pot of tea set on Kairi’s bedside dresser, with two cups full and steaming beside it_

**RIKU** :   
That better not be for Axel.   
_attached image: a selfie of Riku’s unimpressed face_

**KAIRI** :   
It’s for yoooooou  
Trust me Riku I’m not going to share this with anyone if you don’t tell me to  
Also your hair looks ridiculous I love it :D

**RIKU** :   
Ugh. You and everyone else, apparently.  
Okay, fine.  
It’s just...I don’t know. I blame the barrels.

**KAIRI** :   
The barrels??

**RIKU** :   
Yeah. You know, all those videos of Sora doing tricks on barrels?  
In Twilight Town and Thebes.  
He just...I don’t know. I kept watching them, right? Only...I didn’t STOP watching them.  
I couldn’t figure out why, but I just…  
Anyway! Eventually I realized I thought Sora was attractive?

**KAIRI** :   
Why is that a question? XD;

**RIKU** :   
BECAUSE IT’S WEIRD

**KAIRI** :   
Hahaha it’s really not!!!!  
Sora IS attractive, lots of people think so

Riku narrowed his eyes at the gummiphone.

**KAIRI** :   
Riku??? You still there?????

Apparently, he’d spent too long being irritated at that statement of fact. With a sigh, Riku forced his body up and into motion, thumb tapping away even as he made his way slowly back to his storage room. He wasn’t hungry, though he’d probably change his mind in the middle of the night and sneak into the storeroom. For now, though, he was determined to get to the bottom of this.

After all, he’d already begun. May as well see it through.

**RIKU** :   
Yeah.  
But I think that made me jealous.  
See, that’s why I said it was weird. It’s not just that he’s attractive.   
Cloud’s attractive. Hercules and Megara are attractive. Snow White and Cinderella and Aurora, etc etc

**KAIRI** :   
Hey hey what am I chop liver???

**RIKU** :   
Yes.

**KAIRI** :   
:p  
Okay, so  
Do you get why you feel differently about Sora’s attractiveness than you do other people?

**RIKU** :   
If I did, do you think I’d have willingly volunteered for a tea time self help talk?????

**KAIRI** :   
RUDE  
I KNOW YOU LOVE THESE  
Also, tea time is at my favorite spot to sit and think this time  
Bless the three good fairies and their household charms or this tea would be cold by now lol  
 _attached image: a selfie of Kairi seated on a log atop a rise, smiling gently and with her hair blowing in the breeze_

**RIKU** :   
Yes, yes, you’re very pretty Kairi.

**KAIRI** :   
Awwww shucks :D

**RIKU** :   
I’ve never felt like this about anyone before.   
And don’t you dare say I’m a late bloomer. There’s been a lot going on, okay?

**KAIRI** :   
Either way, it’s okay  
Hey  
Did I ever get around to telling you guys about that time I kissed Selphie??  
I don’t think I did, you both had so much going on. It seemed silly to talk about my first kiss, you know? And it’s not like it led anywhere, either, so why tell you???  
I may have been embarrassed  
I don’t know, feelings are weird, and growing up is weirder  
But the point of this story is that...I thought Selphie was really pretty. But I also thought that half my class that year was super pretty too and…  
Selphie was the only one I wanted to kiss  
Being attracted to someone isn’t always enough, so uh….  
I MEAN, NOT THAT I’M SAYING THAT YOU WANT TO KISS SORA???  
THO IF YOU DO THAT’S FINE  
I JUST DIDN’T MEAN TO PUT THAT THOUGHT IN YOUR HEAD   
SORRY?????

Riku...put his gummiphone down.

He was immensely glad that he’d made it back to his storage room before Kairi dropped that last bomb, because Riku needed a moment to lie down and stare blankly at the ceiling. He needed _several_ , actually, because Kairi essentially just asked Riku if he wanted to _kiss Sora_ , and that was-- that was _miles_ beyond weird, wasn’t it? This was _Sora_ , after all, The goofy, scrappy kid he’d grown up teasing and looking out for. Sora’s mom used to say that she’d only given birth to one son, so hell if she knew where the second came from -- brothers, that’s what they’d been.

Hadn’t they?

Except...people grew up. Sometimes feelings grew up, too, in ways that might surprise. 

But had that happened to Riku’s? Kairi certainly seemed to think so, and-- and the truth of it was that while Riku’s first instinct was to deny it, that instinct failed _miserably_ , bowled over by skittishness, nerves, a heat tingling under his skin. Butterflies in his stomach. An undeniable reaction that had Riku nearly in a panic, sweating and flushed and okay, fine, maybe Riku _had_ stared at Sora’s mouth and thought about how nice it looked whenever he pouted and--

Wow, but it seemed so _stupid_ that Riku hadn’t ever thought about this before. It wasn’t as though he were unfamiliar with the different forms romance might take; he’d seen enough of it, even on his darkest path. Love could be many things, felt differently, shown strangely: from the King and Queen’s long distance faithfulness, to the Beast’s desperate fight to save Belle, to Megara’s wary questioning on Hercules’ behalf...

So why couldn’t romance be two idiots fighting to save each other across different worlds? Why couldn’t it be heartmarks and #wishing you were here?

It could be, was the thing.

It _could be_.

\---

_YOU MESSAGED KAIRI DIRECTLY:_  
 **RIKU** :  
Why was Selphie the only person you wanted to kiss?

 **KAIRI** :   
Because I liked her  
I liked her in a way I didn’t like anyone else  
She made my heart pound and my skin get buzzy and put butterflies in my stomach  
I liked her like that

**RIKU** :   
Are you two dating?

**KAIRI** :   
No (‘:  
I only kissed her because of a game  
It was like fireworks for me, but I don’t think it was the same for her

**RIKU** :   
That sucks.

**KAIRI** :   
Yeah 

**RIKU** :  
No, I mean it. That SUCKS.  
I’m sorry, Kairi. ):

**KAIRI** :  
Hahahahaha  
Thank you (: but it’s really okay!  
Not everything works out and that’s all right…..  
Oh  
OH  
DID YOU REALIZE YOU WANT TO KISS HIM

**RIKU** :  
AHHHHH

**KAIRI** :  
AHHHHH INDEED OMG  
BUT OKAY OKAY LOOK  
REAL TALK  
/ahem  
If you’re worried about you and Sora being the same as me and Selphie...I don’t think you should be  
I mean, I don’t know  
I’m not entirely certain he’s thought about kissing people or dating or anything like that  
Like you said before, we’ve had a lot going on lol  
But still...I don’t think you should be afraid to tell him how you feel  
When you’re ready

**RIKU** :   
OMG  
I DIDNT WVEN ADMIT TO ANYTHING

**KAIRI** :  
>:3  
The typos speak volumes

**RIKU** :  
TEA TIME IS OVER  
I REPEAT, TEA TIME IS OVER

**KAIRI** :   
BE BRAVE, NOBLE WARRIOR

\---

SORA:

_A selfie of Sora grinning delightedly surrounded by sun-drenched oak trees, moss, and green meadows peppered with wildflowers._

THIS PLACE IS SO BEAUTIFUL  
#new world #so pretty #i want to roll in the grass #wait a sec #uh oh someone’s in trouble #three half pints to the rescue!

_comments:_  
 **KAIRI** : Don’t put hashtags about someone needing help when SOMEONE NEEDS HELP, you dweeb XD;  
 **SORA** : THERE WAS PLENTY OF TIME  
 **DONALD** : that guy was weird  
 **GOOFY** : I wonder where he went!!

\---

Riku was _supposed_ to be taking a break in between endurance exercises with Phil that morning, stretching out his overworked muscles. Instead, he was on his ass in the bleachers and trying not to open up the gummifeed so he could stare once more at that new photo of Sora. He was also trying not to think about how long he’d _already_ spent staring at it, or about how it kept making his chest squeeze tight, longing a heavy weight in his heart, dragging him down, nearly as impossible to wrangle as Braveheart.

Blaming Kairi would be convenient, but even before her talk of kissing he would have been spinning in circles, driven to distraction by Sora, Sora, _Sora_.

Did Riku want to kiss him?

Everyone kept telling him to listen to his heart, and for once, Riku was fairly certain he’d done it right. He wished the answer were simple, without consequence. He wished he could simply say _Yes_ and then move on, get back to tackling Braveheart and Organization XIII, save Aqua and everyone else suffering.

But it wasn’t merely yes. It was yes, Riku wanted to kiss Sora, _and_ he wanted to keep him safe. He wanted to help his best friend save all of the worlds and he wanted to talk to him for the pure joy of listening to his voice, sharing ideas, reminiscing. He wanted to kiss him _and_ he wanted to be still and quiet while sitting next to him, simply existing together beneath a sea of stars. He wanted to hold his hand, ease his fears, confide all his sorrows and secret ambitions, he wanted--

Everything.

All of it.

Which was slightly terrifying, to be honest, and felt more like a problem than a solution. Because Riku had always known he loved Sora, but he hadn’t planned on falling _in_ love with him, on wanting more than friendship -- had never fathomed the possibility at all that he _might_ , despite how special Sora was, how important, all the ways he’d been making Riku feel for so long now…

Oh.

Riku was in love with Sora.

He’d gone ahead and had that thought like it was the most natural thing in the world and oh _shit_ he was really and actually _in love with Sora_ , wasn’t he? The goofiest of goofballs and the bravest person Riku knew and this was _so much_. So very, very much to realize all at once, like an electric shock to the heart, the world opening up, unfolding in colors and shapes you’d never seen before, but somehow gave reason to all the mysteries and made sense of all the inconsistencies.

“I’m an idiot,” Riku whispered to his phone, the screen still mercifully blank. 

He was an idiot and a fool and he didn’t know what to do with this. Because seriously, if this was how he felt, then what was he meant to _do_ with it? He didn’t know, and he didn’t know if it changed anything, if he wanted to laugh or cry, be happy or sad, call up Sora or find a dark hole to hide in, but… 

“Hey, kid!” Phil hollered. “You done giggling with your buddies?! We’ve got work to do!”

Riku stood on shaky legs. Pocketed his gummiphone and called up Braveheart, heavy and unwieldy in Riku’s grip. It pulled at him, threatening to make him fall.

For once, Riku didn’t fight it.

He let it drag him forward, out of his head. Let the strain of carrying such a burden keep him in the moment, reminding him of everything they were fighting for.  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> pls forgive me for linking braveheart so heavily with riku's feels for sora i couldn't resist (': hope you had fun reading!


End file.
